| Personality And Problems Essay, Research Paper
Problems and Personality
Aurora?s virginity has been stolen. Her brothers are expected to get revenge. This is a major life problem. Her brothers are expected to kill for revenge. This is a solution to this major life problem (Marquez 37). Will they kill the man who took her sisters virginity? How the Sandoval brother?s decide to solve this problem describes who they are. Just like how anyone?s solution to his or her problem describes who he or she is. A major life problem is a conflict whether it is internal or external that will impact someone?s life in a major way. This differs from an everyday conflict in that any solution to this conflict will ultimately lead to the same end result with out affecting anyone?s life in a major way. What one has to worry about is the tendency for everyday conflicts to turn into major life problems.
In accordance with Nathan Amy, the way that many conflicts are turned into major life problems is that a small everyday conflict is blown way out of proportion and turned into a big problem (21). This could happen in many different situations. An example might be at a home where a teenager?s dislike towards his mother?s cooking is seen as a minor conflict. This minor conflict can easily be turned into a major life problem simply by having the mother believe that because her son does not appreciate her cooking that he must also not appreciate anything else that she does for him. This can then escalade and when another minor conflict occurs between them that might just be enough for the mother to get tiered of her ungrateful son and she might end up kicking him out of the house. Or the teenager can get tiered of the situation and decide to leave. Now both of these two results are major life problems.
Another example of the transformation of a small problem into a major life problem is a person?s conflict with society. A boy that seems to be slightly deformed, comes in daily conflict with the other children in his society, they tease him (Matute CH.4). This of course is an ordinary conflict because most children get teased at one time or another during their life. The only difference is that this boy blows his conflict way out of proportion, this deformed boy takes this teasing as a major part of his life and may start to block out other more positive things to his life. This will ultimately damage his self-esteem and this is when the ordinary teasing becomes a major life problem. After any conflict whether it started as a minor one and them became or has always been a major life problem, there are several ways that they can be solved.
The ways of solving major life problem differs greatly. Violence is one of these ways; violence could either be towards oneself or towards other people. For example killing is a way to solve a major life problem using violence, if one feels that someone has done something horrible to him or someone that he knows then he could opt to kill who ever did that horrible action. Another solution is the taking of ones life, when a major problem becomes too much to handle this may seem like the best solution (Baldwin 42).
There are also non-violent ways to resolve a problem. One of these is by either not doing anything about the problem or something very impersonal like a court battle. This non-violent approach to the problem is known as the passive approach. Although it is not the most popular approach it is still used. The mentality behind this method of problem solving is that if the problem was meant to be solved then it will solve it self, and if the problem was not meant to be solved then it will not. We see this when a young man who?s wife has just left him decides to do nothing but wait for her to return when and if she is ready to return (Lorca 93).
Prayer is yet another way to solve one?s major life problems. Although this way to solve a problem is not practiced by many because the results are not seen immediately most of the time. This causes people to get frustrated and that is the reason why people opt for other kinds of problem solving. Yet when prayer is used for problem solving it usually has the best results. This is may or may not be due to some miraculous intervention but it is mostly a way to make people relax. Relaxation leads to meditation that leads into thinking of other better ways of solving the problem. An example of this is when some one dies, people pray which brings closure and relaxation to the family members that are in mourning. As one could see there are many ways to solve major life problems, but one might be asking, which is the best way. The answer to this depends on what type of person that one is because different types of people solve their problems differently.
There are many different types of people. There are those who seem to be very quiet and they also seem to keep everything to themselves, these are the introverts (Nierenberg & Calero 27). I wanted to tell them many things about me. I wanted them to know that I was not just different but that I was special. I could not tell them I tried to scream to the top of my lungs but they were unable to hear me the only person that heard me was my self. I guess I was too shy to say anything (Matute 47). This was said be Juan a boy that was deformed while he was being teased. Juan is a perfect example of an introvert. He, Juan would hardly ever speak to anyone and very seldom spoke his mind.
Then there are those who say the first thin that comes into their mind. They are very open about their believes and they always give their opinion. These are the extroverts (Nierenberg & Calero 30). When I found out that my sister?s virginity had been stolen, like a hungry boy steels a piece of bread from a crowed market place, all that I would say to any one that knew about this was that I would kill that bastard. Then I went into my sister?s room and asked that little whore whom she had sinned with. (Marquez 41). This person who happens to be one of the Sandoval brothers is an extrovert.
We then see a different type of person one that is hopeful that everything in life will turn out just find. This type of person always finds the lighter side of any situation whether it is good or bad. This type of person is an optimist (Nierenberg & Calero 37). One of these dark days she will be mine no matter if she wishes that she were with my cousin (Lorca 45). The boyfriend who by this quote can certainly be classified as an optimist because we see that even if the situation looks bad he still struggles through it with hope said this.
The last type of person that I will be describing is one that really sees no good in himself or his fellow man. He also sees no hope for his future. This is a pessimist (Nierenberg & Calero 44). We see a very good example of a pessimist when Nora is too frightened to tell Torvald that she had forged a signature in order to get money. Nora in this case only sees the bad effects that will occur if she were to tell Torvald the truth (Ibsen 37). Therefore this makes Nora a pessimistic person. These people are all very different and their reactions will also be very different when they are faced with a major life problem. How they react will once again demonstrate what type of person they are.
When introverts are faced with a major life problem they resolve this problem with prayer. This is due to the fact that introverts do not like to interact much with others and they prefer to keep to themselves. Therefore by praying they do not have any contact with anyone else except their God and their inner selves. I hope that God comes down and sees that they have done me wrong and he punishes them, come God, please come. God I beg thee (Matute 91). Juan said this quote, when the pain of the constant teasing from his society was too much to bare. This proves that an introvert like Juan when faced with a major life problem will pray in order to solve the problem.
On the other hand when most extroverts are faced with a major life problem they tend to solve their problem with violence. Because extroverts always are so out going and they do not like to be told what to do and how to live their lives, they choose violence because it allows them to express themselves in different levels. We will have to kill him. We will wait for when he comes out from the church (Marquez 75.) This is what one of the two very extrovert Sandoval brothers told the other after their sisters virginity had been stolen and the town expected them to resolve this issue. Since they were both extroverts they solved this problem the way that extroverts would most commonly do, they solved it with violence.
Optimists usually solve their problems through prayer. The reason for this is that since the optimist are so hopeful of everything they believe that with prayer their God will listen to them and help them. I got down on my knees and started to pray to go and that is when I found her. (Lorca 87.) This quote was said right after the boyfriend goes to look for his wife that has just left him. He, the boyfriend is an Optimist.
Pessimist often times will immediately result to violence and this is do to the fact that they are so negative that they think that there really is no other way to solve the problem. Then other times pessimist solve their problems with a passive approach, this is because they have so little hope for the future that they do not care about resolving their problems. An example of this is when Nora says nothing about the letter that will reveal everything to Torvald about her illegal activities (Ibsen 38).
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